We are fa-mi-ree
Saying most of my family have migrated would be somewhat of an understatement. My relatives are spread out all across the globe. If u had wet fingers and sprinkled on a map i bet half the droplets would land on places i have family - right from Victoria Peak in Hong Kong to Thrichur in India.
So it would be safe to say that i don't really know most of my cousins. The ones we were super bonded with moved to Canada 12 years ago, and now its odd getting past five sentences. The only three i still manage to stay on the same wavelength with are getting increasingly involved in their careers and one is about to take off to Aussieland in a week.
So i was somewhat resigning myself to thinking that i've lost my chances to building a relationship with these people. If i couldnt even maintain one with the cousins i started out being close to, what are the odds of sharing a beer and sneaking mischeif with the ones that have lived a plane ride away from us all their lives, and visit once a year.
I was pleasently proved wrong today. What started out with the mammoth task (only to me because having slept at 5 am everything just moved slower then usual) of having to throw together a sudden lunch for my uncle and his family from Burnei taught me not to judge or assume.I've noticed in the past couple of outings, that maybe change is something i can look forward to. I have to admit i played a very minimal role in actually trying to get the ball rolling, and i have to give all credit to my cousins for stepping up like there wasnt that lost 20 years in between. It did feel a little awkward at the beginning, and i did think the last time i saw them that the next time we meet we would have to start over all once again. But today, things just seemed to fall in place right. And what is more pleasing, is that we moved beyond just cathing up on each other lives and exhanging pleasentries today. Today we deliberated on each others future plans, we shared past expereinces (what little mutual ones that exist, thankfully are all good ones), we opened up with family secrets, we dropped our guards and genuinely made an impact on each other.
And when it was time to say goodbye and plan the next meeting, the whole aura of having to try hard, or maybe even pretention to an extent, was clearly gone. The next time we meet up, we can skip the catching up and politeness and move straight to pissing on each other.
So it would be safe to say that i don't really know most of my cousins. The ones we were super bonded with moved to Canada 12 years ago, and now its odd getting past five sentences. The only three i still manage to stay on the same wavelength with are getting increasingly involved in their careers and one is about to take off to Aussieland in a week.
So i was somewhat resigning myself to thinking that i've lost my chances to building a relationship with these people. If i couldnt even maintain one with the cousins i started out being close to, what are the odds of sharing a beer and sneaking mischeif with the ones that have lived a plane ride away from us all their lives, and visit once a year.
I was pleasently proved wrong today. What started out with the mammoth task (only to me because having slept at 5 am everything just moved slower then usual) of having to throw together a sudden lunch for my uncle and his family from Burnei taught me not to judge or assume.I've noticed in the past couple of outings, that maybe change is something i can look forward to. I have to admit i played a very minimal role in actually trying to get the ball rolling, and i have to give all credit to my cousins for stepping up like there wasnt that lost 20 years in between. It did feel a little awkward at the beginning, and i did think the last time i saw them that the next time we meet we would have to start over all once again. But today, things just seemed to fall in place right. And what is more pleasing, is that we moved beyond just cathing up on each other lives and exhanging pleasentries today. Today we deliberated on each others future plans, we shared past expereinces (what little mutual ones that exist, thankfully are all good ones), we opened up with family secrets, we dropped our guards and genuinely made an impact on each other.
And when it was time to say goodbye and plan the next meeting, the whole aura of having to try hard, or maybe even pretention to an extent, was clearly gone. The next time we meet up, we can skip the catching up and politeness and move straight to pissing on each other.
posted by Annushia at 6:28 AM
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